who will be next World Bank President What will they do


Graveyard humor in the Bank. An anonymous donor from the World Bank has compiled some of the wittier observations on the fate that awaits the staff under a Paul Wolfowitz presidency. See for yourself ...

Rumours have that the new WB President, after being appointed, will announce important changes at the WB:

* All employees will have to wear a helmet with a a digital camera when at work.
* All employees will have to attend to the salute to the US flag at 6:00 am in the hall of the MC.
* The WB motto will be changed from "Our dream is a world without poverty... " to "Our dream is a world without poor people ... We will move all of them to Guantanamo"
* The conditionality guidelines will be streamlined to only 1 article:"You do what we tell you otherwise we invade you."
* All WB public works contracts to be attributed to Halliburton after transparent and fair bidding process.
* The cafeteria will carry only Meals Ready to eat.
* Initial orientation of new recruits will be in Bagram Base in Afghanistan
* The Health room will be abolished. Staff will use the Veterans Hospitals
* Any response to an order from a superior will be "Sir, Yes
* Rough hazing of female recruits will be introduced
* Planning for project implementation after loan signature will be abolished. "If post victory planning was not needed in Iraq why would it be elsewhere.."
* Senior Management will travel to and from work by helicopter
* Only Senior Management will be issued flak vests
* Ordinary staff will be issues shirts with a target pattern printed on the back
* Shuttle bus services to the Pentagon will be offered on the hour every hour
* Shuttle bus services to the CIA will be maintained
* Staff on mission will only be allowed to travel on Boeing aircraft.
* Upon return from mission staff will not be allowed to claim for reimbursement for entertainment expenses unless such expenses were incurred at an approved US franchised fast food restaurant.

Soren Ambrose ~ March 25, 2005

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